Oh, great. It’s that time of the year again. You know…resolution time. Usually, I don’t even bother. By the time January 2nd or 3rd rolls around, most of my resolutions have gone the way of the Dodo. But this year I’m going to try something a little different. This year I’m going to make some reasonable resolutions…ones I can actually accomplish. No more ridiculousness like “lose 50 pounds”, or “finish my novel”, or “volunteer in my spare time/donate blood/give to charity”. Such lofty goals are just a set-up for disappointment. This year my New Year’s Resolutions are going to be small, realistic…easy. So, without further ado, I give you, my resolutions for 2010:
1. Blog more often, at least once a week. They don’t all have to be good, or necessarily even entertaining, but a few paragraphs of my random thoughts ought to suffice.
2. Play less FarmVille. And by “less” I mean restrict visits to my farm to once a day (or less).
3. Finish reading Stephen King’s The Dome. Who knew he could write such a LONG book? And with SO many characters?!? My god, man, I get it. You’re a wonderful storyteller. No need to show off. I’m 300+ pages into this tome and not much has happened and you’re STILL introducing new characters. Get on with it already. I mean, the title pretty much covers the main issue so how about you start revealing the reason behind the Dome? All I’ve got is: the Dome is impermeable, the hicks in the town are mostly crazy and all potentially dangerous, and the town children are all speaking nonsense about “Halloween” and “pink stars”. The next 600+ pages had better be riveting. RIVET-ing, you hear? (I have a confession to make…when I went to look up exactly how many pages long The Dome was, I couldn’t help but stop by my farm and harvest some crops. I know, I know. I could have just walked my lazy butt into the other room, where the book actually is, and checked, but…I had farm chores to do, okay? Get off my back! The resolutions don’t start until tomorrow! I still have one day of farming left. Which brings me to my next resolution…)
4. Go outside daily. I’ll be honest, in the past two months, there have been days where I haven’t left the house. Now, to be fair, I did have a back spasm that left me completely incapacitated for almost a week. AND I had the flu about ten days after that. THEN, I hurt my back again. And, as if God hadn’t punished me enough, immediately following that I came down with the nastiest cold I’ve ever had. Seriously. It was resistant to all forms of treatment including, but not limited to, massive fluid intake, “The nighttime, sniffling, sneezing, coughing, aching, stuffy head, fever, so you can rest medicine”, tomato soup and tuna melts (which, until this point in time, I believed could cure ANYTHING), and good, old fashioned bed rest. So, some days, perhaps more days than entirely necessary, were spent indoors. Barring any unforeseen illness or injury, I fully intend to adhere to this resolution.
5. Be less flaky. If you’re one of my friends, I’ve probably cancelled plans with you more than once (If not, then you’re my FAVORITE friend…kidding. I love you all EQUALLY.). I call it the “Cameron Frye Syndrome”. The full spectrum of CFS can be observed in the following clip from the seminal ‘80s film, Ferris Bueller’s Day Off, specifically from the 3:03 mark through the end:
That last minute-long conversation Cameron has with himself in the car is the very same inner monologue I endure every time I have made plans to meet my friends. Although, not just limited to friends, CFS extends to doctor’s appointments, going to work, and really anything else that involves leaving the house and interacting with other human beings. I’m not anti-social. I’m just pro-me.
Well, there they are. I know, there are only 5 of them, and tradition dictates at least ten resolutions for such a list to truly be taken seriously. But, like I said, I’d like to keep all of these little promises to be a better Kimberly, so I’m starting small. It may not be much, but at least it’s a start. Who knows? Maybe I’ll even add more as the year passes and these simple changes become routine…but let’s not get ahead of ourselves, okay?
Now, if you’ll excuse me, I’ve a farm to plow.
P.S. Happy New Year!
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